Why We Owe Thanks To Fox News For Our Republican Presidential Candidates

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We really ought to thank Rupert Murdoch and Fox News for the crème de la crème collection of crazed crackpots entering the presidential race. None of these candidates would ever have gained so much attention had it not been for Fox News’ drive to “entertain” Americans with their “conservative” version of news. But since entertainment progenerates the most contemptible people to gain ratings, these folk represent best Republicans potential candidates.

Former Governor Sarah Palin has appeal with conservative voters through her redneck, ignorant, misinformed, incredulous claims she makes. Here is a candidate who after two years felt her governorship was too hard and quit, albeit for a more lucrative money-making scheme. After peddling her books, half-way toured the U.S. until she quit again, and her movie “Undefeated” (which debuted to empty theaters), Palin is still the glint in conservatives eyes for the Republican nomination. Palin embodies the stereotypical pretty, bubble headed, bimbo armed with a firearm. What more could the conservative male ask for in a woman?

Representative Michele Bachmann also catches the eye of the conservative voters who‘d love to overthrow our federal government. Though she is not quite as pretty, or bubble-headed, or bimbo-esque as Palin, Bachmann oozes with her own brand of crazy. Despite her shrills for balanced budgets, she voted against the “Cut, Cap, and Balance” measure in the House because it was not extreme enough. Despite her claims towards State’s rights, when it comes to gay marriage, Bachmann would overrule State’s rights to clearly define marriage consisting of one man and one woman on the federal level. And let us not forget that here is a candidate who absolutely and irrevocably is opposed to Federal rule, and yet she is running for the presidency in the same Federal government she wants to dismantle. Bachmann embodies the ill-informed, hypocritical, extremist, bullshit artist. What more could a conservative militant male ask for in a woman?

Former Governor Mitt Romney is predicted to have a good chance of defeating President Obama. Here is a former businessman who is believes that corporate taxes are the second highest in the world, but he really hasn’t investigated this claim to discover his claim is a lie. But then, Romney is opposed to the Frank-Dodd Bill, despite his acknowledgement that he never actually read it. His wealth was accumulated through buying out businesses to dismantle and ship them overseas. Romney claims to be “unemployed”, yet his wealth protects from the suffering the rest of the unemployed feel. He both stood for and against abortion, which ever proves to be the most opportunistic for his future. Romney embodies the “whatever I need to say to get elected” politician. What more could a conservative myopic ask for in a candidate?

Governor Rick Perry is the new up and coming glint in the conservative eye. There really isn’t much to say about this religious zealot who believes all of our economic woes are beyond his comprehension. His answer to his budget problems is to “turn it over to God”. The concerns over his erasing the separation of Church and State are nothing compared to his belief that God should take the wheel! Religion had nothing to do with an unbalanced budget. When a state or country overly grants tax cuts for businesses at the expense of social services, it takes math skills to identify and resolve budgetary woes, not praying to God for solutions. Perry embodies the religious, ignorant, conservative with a self-inflated sense of self-worth. What more could a conservative denialist ask for?

But nevertheless, it would be a real shame for us to lose Fox News. No one else encourages such a congregation of ill-informed, delusional, obtuse sofa coaches. None of the candidates among the Republican Party have leadership skills, nor have they accurately identified the cause of our economic recession. Instead, they represent the worst of humanity. These candidates sell Americans what they believe to be wrong with our country, yet offer no solid solutions. Well, except for removing Obama from office. They all believe that compromise is a weakness and their personal ideals are ordained by God. If it wasn’t for Fox News, the Republican Party may have found a potential threat to President Obama’s reelection. Only through Fox News could a “news organization” consider such simpletons as serious candidates.