Rarely does it occur that I miss word of a giant rally in town but August 21, 2011, or Sunday, was an exception. I was riding my Segway downtown and all of a sudden stumbled upon a gay pride parade. Admittedly, I have never been to one, despite having lesbian mothers, but I have heard so much about them. I decided to investigate and see if all the rumors were true. It would be hard to imagine that Faux news could be wrong. I mean Ann Coulter has to be right, right? A dumb blonde can never be wrong, or at least that’s what I thought. I mean clearly they are fair and impartial as you see in my interview here. But, needless to say, it was a beautiful day outside (well, excluding the occasional thunderstorm) and I had to get to the bottom of this.
I have heard so many times on conservative media that going to gay functions, ESPECIALLY gay pride festivals and parades, will turn you gay. I figured, gay people seem pretty happy, so I wasn’t risking too much. I never chose to be straight, I am just not at all sexually attracted to guys; but if that changed at this festival, so long as I was happy, I wouldn’t care. So I went to all of the functions, protested the bible thumpers, watched the parade, listened to the speeches, talked to people, and even stayed for the dancing portion. After all that, I still was not gay; could it be that a straight person could be around gay people and not convert? Or am I just superhuman, somehow immune to homosexuality? I had to dig further because Rush is a pretty reputable guy. Anyone who’s smart enough to get that many pills for that many years has to be right, I thought. So I found a couple, Ricky and Linda Rumpel (interviewed in the video below), who are regular protesters and even got married recently on the Capitol Steps; apparently they didn’t turn gay either.
So, having spoken with hundreds of straight people many of whom have been to many of these and not converted, I realized that Faux may not quite be right on that one. I decided to move onto the next rumor I had heard, this one from a State Representative from Montana but shared by many in the right-wing media. This rumor being that gay people like to recruit straight people to become gay. I thought surely if this were true they would have some sort of recruitment station. Given as my finances have been a bit low lately, being a sacrifice I am glad to make for the better of the people, I thought there would be some sort of sign on bonus, maybe a scholarship package, or even health insurance for being gay. Maybe then, I thought (although was not too convinced) I would turn gay. So I walked around asking people where the recruitment station was. They had no recruitment station, imagine that; I left without a sign on bonus.
So there you have it folks: going to a gay pride parade or festival does not turn you gay. I am, still, not in any way sexually attracted to men. But on a serious note gay rights are something that I hold dear. I was born straight and my mom was born a lesbian. What I find even more intriguing, is how people will go through so much effort just to try to fight something that has no effect on them, whatsoever. I believe everyone should be able to love whomever makes them happy. And every human being should have equal rights, something that is so often lacking. At the parade there were some counter protesters holding their bible signs. You see, what they don’t understand is they are picking and choosing Leviticus verses. I believe heavily in Leviticus 11:9-12 which clearly states that eating shrimp is an abomination. For that reason I held a sign and asked them to repent for their shrimp eating; they did not do so. By strict biblical standards we are all going to hell. So when you get there, will you join me for a coffee??
Video of the March and some interviews:
Note: Segway Jeremy Ryan has become a full-time member of the protests at the Wisconsin State Capitol. Formerly a businessman, he gave up his business to join the fight for the middle class in the State of Wisconsin. Through videos and writings he has informed hundreds of thousands of people of what was going on at the Wisconsin State Capitol once the mainstream media had mostly abandoned the protests. His full-time activism is completely funded by the people. If you would like to help out please click here.
Edited By: Alexis Atherton