In a move that’s sure to please his Latino constituents, Mississippi Rep. Steve Holland (D) introduced a bill that would rename the Mississippi portion of the Gulf of Mexico, the “Gulf of America.”
The bill, HB 150, says that “for all official purposes within the state of Mississippi, the body of water located directly south of Hancock, Harrison and Jackson counties shall be known as the ‘Gulf Of America’; and for related purposes.”
Apparently Holland isn’t aware that Mexico is part of the North American Continent. But, as long as we’re changing names to be more ‘American’ sounding, I’ll put forth a few suggestions of other names that should be changed.
1. New York – Yes, in England they do speak the same language (basically). They do sort of look like us, but we fought an entire war just to get away from them. Do we really need our largest city (and one of our largest states) to be named after one of their cities, and not even a very big one?
2. Louisiana’s French Quarter – Need I say more?
3. Texas – That’s right, we actually let them Spanish people name one of our most ‘American’ states. And while we’re at it, we’d better change California, Colorado, Florida, Montana and Nevada.
4. New Mexico – I can’t believe we’ve let them get away with that name.
5. Alaska and Hawaii – They might not be Spanish, but they sure sound foreign.
6. Los Angeles, San Francisco, San Jose and really, most of California – Although I’m sure that Holland would be fine with California falling into the Ocean.
7. And while we’re on the topic of oceans, The Pacific Ocean – It’s a Portuguese word.
8. Mississippi – Yes, it’s actually a Native American word, but it’s not ‘real American!’
9. America – Our beloved country was named after a foreigner. That’s right, we were named after an Italian explorer named Amerigo Vespucci.
10. Rep. Holland – What kind of American is named after a country that has legalized prostitution and drugs?
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I hope the bill was in fact meant to be a bit of sarcasm, if it was offered by a Democrat. I think Tyler Hanson is correct. Thanks, Tyler
This is pretty funny but…just wanted to point out that Holland is not a country. It is a region of The Netherlands, which happens to contain Amsterdam, Rotterdam, and The Hague. It’s a popular way for Americans to refer to the entire country of The Netherlands, but it’s geographically incorrect.