In the wake of the deadly gun shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary, we’ve learned that we worship guns more than pink slime. This blind and unwavering worship is so severe that some Americans first reaction to the massacre was not complete and utter shock and disgust at the shootings themselves, but that the shootings meant the Kenyan Usurper-in-Chief was going to confiscate our Rambo toys. Yes, we suck.
The NRA has done everything in its massive lobbying power to resist some of the most basic and sensible gun measures, and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better. Now, they want to market their products to children themselves. Why not just offer kids a free bottle of Jack and smokes with every gun.
It’s well-known that The National Shooting Sports Foundation and the industry-funded NRA dole out fall out shelters of cash to get kids interested in guns. Apparently these efforts include getting kids interested in assault weapons, including the exact same model used in the Newtown shootings. Hell yeah! Who needs to prepare a generation of kids to read, spell, do math and perform surgeries on an aging population when we can prepare them for the very profound and much-needed professions of clay-pigeon shooting. Better yet, these ads target girls as well. And you thought you hated the Hunger Games when it was just a movie?
From the New York Times:
The pages of Junior Shooters, an industry-supported magazine that seeks to get children involved in the recreational use of firearms, once featured a smiling 15-year-old girl clutching a semiautomatic rifle. At the end of an accompanying article that extolled target shooting with a Bushmaster AR-15 — an advertisement elsewhere in the magazine directed readers to a coupon for buying one — the author encouraged youngsters to share the article with a parent.
“Who knows?” it said. “Maybe you’ll find a Bushmaster AR-15 under your tree some frosty Christmas morning!”
Indeed, our kids will be rocking around the glock come next Christmas.
We all know that pussy, freedom-killin’ govmint laws prevent the sale of rifles to those under the age of 18 But that hasn’t stopped the NRA from using the Boy Scouts to get kids interested in guns. But the Times report says that they are trumping up their efforts to include assault rifles.
“Newer initiatives by other organizations go further, seeking to introduce children to high-powered rifles and handguns while invoking the same rationale of those older, more traditional programs: that firearms can teach ‘life skills’ like responsibility, ethics and citizenship.” (Think Progress)
So just how the tobacco companies went after killing satisfying a continuous supply of customers by targeting kids in the 198os (who could forget SmokeMon?), the gun industry appears to be doing the exact sample thing with guns. With guns being a major converting religion in America, the NRA’s efforts at manipulating fragile and malleable minds appears to be no different from what right-wing religious organizations do.
Michael is a comedian/VO artist/Columnist extraordinaire, who co-wrote an award-nominated comedy, produces a chapter of Laughing Liberally, wrote for NY Times Laugh Lines, guest-blogged for Joe Biden, and writes a column for MSNBC.com affiliated Cagle Media. Follow him on Twitter and Facebook, and like NJ Laughing Liberally Lab if you love political humor from a progressive point-of-view. Seriously, follow him or he’ll send you a photo of Rush Limbaugh bending over in a thong.