Frustrated Christian Conservatives Are Logging The Most X-Rated Google Searches, Finds Study

A new study published in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior has found that Christian Conservatives are big fans of online porn.

The study, conducted by researchers from Canadian Universities, established that citizens in U.S. states that identify as more religious and conservative are also more likely to search for sex online, out-doing their liberal rivals by a considerable margin.

It seems that while liberals are out having real sex, Christian Conservatives are busy condemning them for it, then masturbating furiously to the online substitute.

The study even breaks down the differences between states that identify as religiously conservative, and those that identify as politically conservative.  While political conservatives were most likely to look use search terms like “gay sex, free porn and xxx,” religious conservatives were cannier in their language, using generalized sex terms, and even scientific terms for bodily parts.

In heavily religious states, abstinence is often pushed as the only safe sex, with very little to offer in the way of sexual education. Unfortunately, that leaves a growing number of people with questions about sex but no answers. Enter Google: the best way to find an answer to personal, possibly embarrassing questions without calling attention to yourself. So, of course, the study finds that religious communities have a higher percentage of sex-related searches. That’s what happens when you can’t find it elsewhere.

As sociologist Dr. Chauntelle Tibbals points out:

“There’s nothing wrong with variability in sexuality, but when people are touting these very hard lines about what others should and shouldn’t be doing and then in their private lives they’re not doing what they say, that doesn’t surprise me … because they themselves are putting boundaries around their own sexuality, limitations on their own desires. It’s almost like they’re painting themselves into a corner.”

She has a point.  The conservative movement has become overwhelmingly puritanical in its view of sex and sexuality, placing an ideological straitjacket over the self-expression of adherents.

Girls as young as 10 are being dragged along to Purity Balls where they undergo faux wedding ceremonies with their fathers and pledge their virginity to their notional future husband. Sex education for young men and women is solely abstinence based; schools in conservative states are inviting in educators who are “slut-shaming” teens and young adults who enter healthy, consensual, sexual relationships prior to marriage.

This concoction of shame and taboo means conservatives are finding their kicks in the virtual world instead.

As the Daily Beast reports:

Earlier this year, Homegrown Video announced the results of a six-month study on amateur porn demographics. Just under a third of all homemade sex tape submissions were created in the “Bible Belt”. Perhaps even more surprising is the increased female involvement. According to Homegrown Video owner Farrell Timlake, women are now submitting their own videos almost as much as men. Mind you these are not porn stars, just regular folks at home who film themselves for the world to see.

But perhaps even more interesting is the type of user-generated content coming from areas of the country some consider repressed. ‘We get so many interracial tapes from states that people would stereotype as being racially bigoted areas,’ says Timlake. ‘And that plays into the same thing: the more repressed it is, the more taboo it is, the more somebody is going to want to see it or touch that fire.’

The State and political commentators should be making no greater contribution on the matter of sex than ensuring its legal integrity — consent.  Instead, conservatives seek to undermine legislation that would protect women from the act and consequences of rape, namely by de-funding or opposing sex education, access to health services, contraception and abortion.

As for male rape — not even on their agenda.

The hypocrisy common across the conservatives parties and movements is that while demanding the the government stay out of your hospital and your gun cabinet, they are forcing the government into your bedroom.