Pastor Brags About God Saving Him From Car Crash, Even Though His Wife Wasn’t So Lucky (VIDEO)

” This is what my new Jaguar looked like Sunday night,” Pastor Phil Kidd bragged on his Facebook page.

“BUT LISTEN TO THIS…It never messed up my hair. It never unbuttoned my suit coat. It never even moved my Mont Blonc [sic] pen from my shirt pocket. Sheltered In The Arms Of God…”

But if God sheltered Kidd, why didn’t he also shelter his wife, Leslie? Thankfully, she survived as well, but she fractured two vertebrae and has to wear a neck brace.  Still, it’s strange how while Kidd, his hair, his suit coat, and his “Mont Blonc” pen were rolling in God’s sheltering arms “4 1/2 times at 65 miles an hour down the interstate,” this pastor’s poor wife was left to her own devices.

For those of you who don’t know what a “Mont Blonc” penis, I mean pen is, Mont Blanc is a line of “luxury writing instruments” that cost $800.00 and up.

Pastor Phil Kidd: This is what my new Jaguar looked like Sunday night after rolling 4 1/2 times at 65 miles an hour down the interstate.. BUT LISTEN TO THIS…It never messed up my hair. It never unbuttoned my suit coat. It never even moved my Mont Blonc pen from my shirt pocket. Sheltered In The Arms Of God…

Pastor Phil Kidd’s Facebook post with photo of his no-longer spiffy new Jaguar.

According to his Facebook page, Kidd is a radio evangelist and pastor of the Emmaus Baptist Church in Kingsport, Tennessee. He and his wife appear to have been the victims of a hit-and-run, most likely committed by someone who can’t stand douchey guys in red Jaguars. Alas, the assailant had no idea Kidd was driving his red Jaguar for the Lord, or he wouldn’t have done it.

And — oh! — it turns out the Jaguar was brand spankin’ new, as Kidd explained to the “thousands” of adoring fans who clamored for photos of the wreckage…Which, of course, Kidd was happy to provide.  Heck, they didn’t even have the car long enough to get the oil changed.

Pastor Phil Kidd's Facebook post with more photos of his no-longer spiffy new Jaguar. Thousands of people are asking what our new Jaguar looked like after the accident. We didn't even have it long enough to have the oil changed! So here are the pictures. Officials that did the investigation gave those inside this car a 2% chance of survival. Just amazing!

Pastor Phil Kidd’s Facebook post with more photos of his no-longer spiffy new Jaguar.

You’d think — from all of Kidd’s posts — that all was rosy. But no, his wife posted on Facebook that she suffered more serious injuries, though she is luckily expected to make a full recovery. Here, Leslie Kidd thanks friends and family for their prayers and explains that her spinal surgeon said she has a “fracture in my C-6 & C-7 vertebrae. I will be in a neck brace for at least the next 6 weeks.” Luckily, the Kidds’ daughter came home to take care of “us.”

Leslie Kidd: I cannot thank all my friends & family enough for the constant prayers. I saw the spinal surgeon on Tuesday afternoon and I have a fracture in my C-6 & C-7 vertebrae. I will be in a neck brace for at least the next 6 weeks. There is some swelling in my left shoulder causing numbness and tingling down my arm. He said it would go away with time. I am semi-confined to the house and I am not allowed to drive. I thank God we are both alive and able to walk, talk, and move around. After a Dr. visit yesterday, I was able to go to the towing lot and see my car. It is truly a miracle that we walked away. Joann is here and taking good care of us. Our church family is also going beyond the call of duty to make sure we are taken care of. Many of you have messaged me and I am thankful. (For the first days it hurt to talk or just listen). I have read them all and am grateful. Please continue to pray for us.

Leslie Kidd’s Facebook post.

How does this poor woman put up with being married to an insufferable jerk whose first concerns appear to be for himself, his hair, his suit and his Mont Blanc pen? As the folks from Stuff Fundies Like dryly commented:

This raises a few questions. Why does an evangelist drive a Jaguar and write with a Mont Blanc pen? But more to the point, why would any decent human being brag about their hair not being messed up when their wife has serious and painful injuries? Was she not sheltered in the arms of God or does she just really not matter?

But just when you thought this pastor of disaster couldn’t get any more insufferable, Kidd posts another comment on Facebook about how their car stopped flipping right at the five mile marker on Route 26 — and “the number is ‘5’-that is the number of grace. I landed right on grace!!!”

Phil Kidd Facebook post with photo of five-mile Highway marker: Just on the other side of the guard-cable is where my car stopped flipping and starting spinning in circles. NOW notice the mile marker on the interstate sign!!!!! The number is "5"-that is the number of grace. I landed right on grace!!!

Phil Kidd’s Facebook post with photo of the five-mile highway marker.

Watch Pastor Kidd go on and on and on…

Here’s the video with Pastor Kidd going on and on and on about his smashed red jaguar. Alas, his friends, family and congregation will never hear the end of it.

You have got to see and hear this!!! Dr. Kidd standing beside his wrecked Jaguar sharing his story!!! Absolutely unreal…It rolled 4 1/2 times.

Posted by Dr. Phil Kidd on Monday, May 4, 2015

Photo: Phil Kidd’s Facebook page.