Top 5 Stupid Things Pseudo-Christians Said This Week

Talk this week ranged from end times talk to the gay to Jade Helm. We even head ‘across the Pond’ for one stupid comment. So let’s get right to it, shall we?

† The progeny of Jerry Falwell, Jonathan Falwell, is a bit late to the party on this topic. But that doesn’t make him any less stupid about it. Falwell went on Rick Wiles’ Trunews radio show to display that idiocy:

“When a court says that marriage is not between a man and a woman… it can be between a man and a man or a woman and a woman, what that means is that there is no foundational truth involved… So, yes, I can marry 2 or 3 people… I can marry a child, I could marry an animal. Who’s to know when it stops? It just seems to be whatever is popular.”

You know what’s popular? Knowing the law. And it really is annoying that we have to repeat ad nauseam that none of these things can happen because they are against the law. Capice’? And what the heck is “foundational truth?” Here’s a foundational truth; the Constitution protects every American, not just the ones you agree with.

† Rick Wiles had a few ridiculous things to say, himself. After his predictions about Jade Helm turned out to be the fantasies of his fevered conspiracy brain, he doubled down. There will be another Jade Helm, he said:

“[T]his is God’s judgment on the land that this civil war is coming. [In] 2009, when Obama went into the White House, I told our radio audience, this man, before he leaves the White House, he will take this country to civil war. This is the time that you have to get out…. The violence will come next year and what I am telling my audience is, ‘don’t fear Jade Helm 15 but beware Jade Helm 16.’”

Next year, huh? And when that prediction turns out to be as false as a Golden Calf, will Wiles make up a Jade Helm 17? Inquiring minds want to know. Wiles and his ilk just can’t get it through their thick skulls that President Obama will leave office in January, 2017. He will do it without starting a civil war, taking all the guns or tossing people like Wiles in FEMA camps. Of course, then they’ll have another Democratic president to demonize…

† A new character for this column and our cast of crazies, Os Hillman, proved that he has the bona fides to be here. He already has a website where he promotes the Dominionist agenda, a ticket that gets him on this ride. But he really showed his nuttiness when he said that Donald Trump is being used by God:

“I believe part of this is that God is using him to uncover the veil of the current political leadership and culture in America to show us the corrupt nature of what is under that veil. He is espousing a new way of operating because he is sounding a trumpet to the nation that our nation is broken and needs to be fixed. He is becoming a new prophetic voice…”

Oh, brother. The only voice Trump is becoming is the voice of arrogance, belligerence and bullying. He wants to win at any cost, whether it’s the GOP nomination or a business deal. He seems to think the former is the latter, anyway. His is not the voice we want for America. And if God has made him a “trumpet,” we need to fire him and hire Wynton Marsalis.

† Jim Bakker is a name we haven’t heard in a long time. But he’s still just as obnoxious as ever. His issue this time is the end times. He buys into John Hagee’s debunked “blood moons” theory, seeing the non-existent phenomenon as a sign:

“God put up the biggest billboards, they’re bigger than the earth, did you know that? The sun and, I don’t know, the moon, a little bit smaller maybe, big billboards, they’re God’s billboards.”

God’s billboards? Wow. That’s a new one. I wonder what God’s rates are for hiring them out? Bakker was taking a break from hawking his survivalist supplies. He should stick to that because he’s just embarrassing God when he opens his mouth. Besides, everyone knows that God put up these billboards.

† James McConnell is a pastor in Northern Ireland who is being prosecuted under the Section 127 of the U.K.’s 2003 Communications Act. In a sermon, McConnell said that Islam was “heathen,” “satanic” and was “spawned in hell.” He also stated that there are “cells of Muslims” throughout the U.K. The sermon was posted online and McConnell was forced to apologize. But he refused to accept punishment for a lesser charge under the Communications Act, leading to his current prosecution. The case has been postponed until September.

McConnell, though, isn’t afraid to talk about the case. He feels that it’s a huge waste of money. He feels that it is a case of free speech, which has a tighter leash in Britain. Nevertheless, he sent this message out to British Muslims:

“I am no racist, sure I have (former) Muslims in my congregation. I have all sorts of people in my congregation. I have never been a racist. I have never hated anybody in my life. I wouldn’t know how to hate anybody. To every ordinary Muslim out there, I want to say to them that I love them, that I pray for them and if they are in need or in any bother, I am there for them. They are welcome to my church and welcome to hear God’s word.”

Oh, the old “I have friends who are (fill in the blank)” routine. Because if he knows a few, he certainly can’t be racist, right? This isn’t a question of hate, it’s about instigating via hate speech. The very thing that conservatives here and in Britain complain that Muslims are doing. But, while they have no actual proof of that, Pastor McConnell posted his sermon wherein he did exactly that. It’s the “crying ‘Fire!’ in a crowded theater” metric. Unfortunately, to conservative Christians, they only hear that word in Arabic when it is shouted more often in English.


Well, that was… nourishing. I’ll be back next week with more pseudo-Christian silliness. As always, if you spot a crazy comment by any pseudo-Christian, Tweet me @Madwomanmoon. Have a great week!