This Week In Republican Stupidity: The 5 Worst Right-Wing Quotes

Every day of the year, a member of the right-wing opens their mouth and all kinds of stupidity pours out of the hole in their face. More often than not, we are left scratching our heads and asking ourselves, “What in the actual hell did I just hear?” So, we have decided to bring you a weekly round-up of the stupidest, most asinine quotes of the week in a new series called “This Week In Republican Stupidity.” We would tell you to enjoy, but you are probably going to need brain bleach by the time you are finished reading.

READER BEWARE: These quotes may cause severe head pain and Addicting Info takes no responsibility for any lost IQ points or any other damage that occurs as a result of reading all of this dumbf*ckery.

5. Clarence Thomas goes full-on dumbass in marriage equality dissent:

As you now know, the Supreme Court ruled in favor of marriage equality in a 5-4 vote on Friday. While five of the justices understood that the 14th Amendment applies to ALL of us, Clarence Thomas did not agree. In his dissent he let common sense fly out the window and said this:

The corollary of that principle is that human dignity cannot be taken away by the government. Slaves did not lose their dignity (any more than they lost their humanity) because the government allowed them to be enslaved. Those held in internment camps did not lose their dignity because the government confined them. And those denied governmental benefits certainly do not lose their dignity because the government denies them those benefits. The government cannot bestow dignity, and it cannot take it away.

What?! Thomas– an African-American– doesn’t believe slaves lost their dignity? He doesn’t think that being beaten and called a n*gger while they were worked to death and denied humane treatment because of the color of their skin, didn’t cause them to feel less than? He doesn’t think Japanese-Americans felt worthless when they had their homes and belongings ripped away from them and were then imprisoned because of their heritage?

His entire point was to try to say that the LGBT community wasn’t made to feel like they were “less than” because of their sexual orientation. He thinks that they didn’t deserve to be protected under the 14th Amendment; ironic isn’t it? A black Supreme Court judge doesn’t think that a community deserves equal protection? He doesn’t think everyone deserves protection under the very Amendment that made it possible for him to sit on the highest court in the land.

We are going to assume that Clarence Thomas was drunk when he wrote his dissent, because if he was completely sober then he doesn’t have a very good grasp on what the Constitution and its Equal Protection Clause is; and that is a terrifying.

4. Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton thinks the SCOTUS marriage equality ruling paves the way for The Gayto abuse Christians:

In numerous incidents trumpeted and celebrated by a sympathetic media, progressives advocating the anti-traditional marriage agenda have used this issue to publicly mock, deride, and intimidate devout individuals for daring to believe differently than they do. This ruling will likely only embolden those who seek to punish people who take personal, moral stands based upon their conscience and the teachings of their religion.

It is not acceptable that people of faith be exposed to such abuse. The First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution protects our religious liberty and shields people of faith from such persecution, but those aspects of its protections have been denigrated by radicals, echoed by the media and an increasingly-activist [sic] judiciary.”

Whaaaaa?!

This is what happens when people put an imbecile in a position of authority. He’s absolutely right, the First Amendment does allow people to freely practice their religion. It also allows these fake Christians to be the biggest bigots they want to be; but, the First Amendment also protects all of us from becoming a theocracy. This attorney general is forgetting that the Founding Fathers did not believe that religion has any place in government.

Clearly, this fool needs to find a job that doesn’t require him to understand the Constitution.

3. Tennessee Republican thinks America will be like ISIS if they change a park’s name:

State Senator John Stevens is not happy that Democrats have suggested the Nathan Bedford Forrest State Park be renamed:

“What separates us from ISIS? Because that’s what they do, they go around and tear down history in those nations that they’ve conquered. If that’s what America is about now, then it concerns me.”

I’m pretty sure that renaming a state park that is named after a founder of the KKK, is not ISIS-like behavior. Now, if we started, oh I don’t know….lighting people on fire who disagreed with our beliefs, THEN we’d be like the Islamic State. Renaming a park though? Haha.

And didn’t the Confederacy attack the United States? So, if anything, the park is already named after a terrorist; but, hey! What do we know.

2. Ann Coulter once again proves she is a total imbecile when South Carolina’s governor speaks out against the Confederacy:

We all know that Ann Coulter is a special kind of stupid; she proves it every time she opens her mouth. This week she outdid herself when she went off on Republican Governor Nikki Haley expressing her opinion the Confederate flag should be removed from state grounds.

I’m a student of American history, so I’m appalled by––though, I really like to like Nikki Haley since she is a Republican. On the other hand, she is an immigrant and does not understand America’s history.…The Confederate flag we’re talking about never flew over an official Confederate building. It was a battle flag. It is to honor Robert E. Lee. And anyone who knows the first thing about military history, knows that there is no greater army that ever took the field than the Confederate Army.

First of all, Nikki Haley is the American born child of immigrants, so clearly Coulter has no idea WTF she is talking about. She just knows that Haley isn’t über white and assumed she’s an immigrant. No racism or xenophobia there!

Second, no greater army than the Confederate Army? Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t the South lose the Civil War? If it was the best army in the history of forever, they would have won the war, right? Instead, they attacked our country and cost America hundreds of thousands of lives. They were traitors and we shouldn’t fly the flag of a group of people who attacked our country.

Finally, the stupidest quote of the week was…..

1. A South Carolina Republican blamed the victims of the Charleston terrorist attack on the dead.

Rep. William Chumley made the most disgusting comment of the whole week when he said this about the Charleston victims:

“We’re focusing on the wrong thing here. We need to be focusing on the nine families that are left and see that this doesn’t happen again. These people sat in there, waited their turn to be shot. That’s sad. But somebody in there with the means of self-defense could have stopped this. And we’d have had less funerals than we’re having.”

I just can’t even…

One of his colleagues was murdered by a right-wing terrorist along with eight other people and this is his reaction? He thinks that they just wanted to be killed? Is he kidding?! This jackass made this statement as a way to spread the “good guy with a gun” myth that ammosexuals love to pretend is real, even though all of the evidence suggests that guy never shows up when we need him. Not only that, but he spit on the graves of people who lost their lives because of the right’s hateful, racist rhetoric. These people went to church, a safe place to worship, and they never came home.

Rep. Chumley is the biggest right-wing douchebag of the week.

We hope you enjoyed the first edition of right-wing crazy; check back next weekend for more!